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While I had assumed these blanks were all closet cases, many respondents begged to differ. I began by asking respondents why they think men choose not to have face pics in their profiles.
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Some percentage of faceless profiles on the grids in small towns are actually openly gay men. Apparently, this is what rural gay life looks like in 2019: a smartphone screen pocked with digital glory holes. I cannot look at those darkened spaces on my grids and not think of them as relics of our gay past. My Scruff is a little better, with 25 out of 150 showing no face, 10 of those having no pic at all. When I open Grindr, I count 56 out of 100 with no face pic, 48 of those with absolutely no pic at all. But in places like where I live, they’re the norm.
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In bigger cities, faceless profiles that only feature someone’s torso are pretty common completely blank ones may pop up 1 out of 50 times-so uncommonly, most guys probably don’t even interact with them. In rural areas, at certain times of day, your grid may display profiles from 200+ miles away. Your top row may be two to 15 miles away, second row 30–45 miles. In less-densely populated areas, the profiles displayed will have greater distances between them. In a heavily populated area, your grids will display profiles that are very close to you, sometimes within 20 feet, with the breadth of your grid stretching out perhaps one to five miles at most. I should know: As an openly gay man living in central Illinois, blanks are a troubling constant of my daily life.įor those who’ve never received a “sup” at 2 a.m., a bit of background: The two most popular gay dating apps, Grindr and Scruff, feature a GPS grid that shows profiles of nearby men. But in rural regions of the country, the faceless profile-calling card of the forever “discreet”-takes up an unavoidable amount of real estate. In general, this mixing is fine: Ignore the closet cases if you’re not into that. Any number of hookup apps afford them the safety of an anonymous, blank profile in the same sexual ecosystem as the most out-and-proud among us. We’re Here, We’re Married, We’re EmployedĬontact with gay sexuality used to look very different for closeted gay men: parks at night, porn stores, and rest area restrooms that bore the signature punch-out between two stalls just big enough to fit one’s dick through-the storied “glory hole.” More recently, instead of cruising in these secretive physical gay spaces, they have become able to scratch their itch online. Will the NFL Finally Support Gay Players? This post is part of Outward, Slate’s home for coverage of LGBTQ life, thought, and culture.